Being Black

Higgins_Bond_AkhenatonI was 11 years old when I found out I was Black. I grew up around Black people and the only white people I knew were the nuns and my teachers at the catholic school I attended. Everything was normal in my world until one day, my white English teacher made me aware I was different. I adored her and I don’t know how it came up but I asked her what would she do if her son married a Black woman and she said, “Oh no that would never happen. I want my grandchildren to look like me.” Wow. That was the beginning of my journey. It didn’t hit me till then even though two years before I had gotten perfect scores on the Iowa Basics tests we had to take and they could not believe a little 9 year old Black girl in an ‘urban’ catholic all Black school could possibly have scored so high. So they sent a representative to my school to test me alone. I did it again so then I was deemed a genius.

So my journey began where I started to read everything I could find about Black people because I wanted to know why would my teacher say such a thing like something was wrong with me. Then I heard my father curse for the first time in my life when we were driving from St. Louis to Memphis and we stopped at this burger shop where they came up to your car to take your order. We sat, and sat and more cars came and went but nobody came to our car. My father was from New Jersey/New York and I guess wasn’t used to the ‘South” so I learned why Black people always had to pack a lunch. I asked why they didn’t come to our car. I remember he never answered and just kept driving.

My little brain computer started putting things together and the more I read, the more I understood. Nothing was wrong with me, something was wrong with white people. My father soon pronounced he would never work for another white man and he didn’t. But as I sit here writing, I can never recall being told why. Too many of us have never been taught what racism is and how we should handle it. We just learn that we are the ‘OTHER’ and you have to work twice as hard to get half as far, You learn early you are BLACK and that means you are not as smart, not as pretty, not as accomplished, not as valuable. You learn, you know how white folks are but you just have to deal with it.

You see most of us have no clue about who we are and what has happened to us. Most of us know more about the holocaust than the centuries of chattel slavery. The pain of our oppression causes us to do one or more of the following:

  1. Internalize and hate self and become Uncle Ruckus, adopt Stockholm Syndrome where we think of ourselves in terms of our oppressor.
  2. Totally deny the existence of race, racism or the existence of Black culture and live to assimilate at every level.
  3. Adopt aspects of one and two-You know some of your history, you understand racism but you–= blame the victim and think that if you just work hard enough all is well.
  4. You understand white supremacy and know the game and how to play it but never give up your dignity. You understand that if you do not work for nation building among your people you will cease to exist.

Remembering who we are is the entire point of Black History Month but it should be a practice we celebrate everyday. We need to stop being in denial, we need to teach our children what racism is and understand that being pro Black is not necessarily anti-White meaning that there are times to be anti white supremacy to preserve your own culture. Going along to get along has gotten us no where. We need to be honest and take responsibility for our own culture and community and figure out what we have contributed positively and negatively in context of understanding systemic racism and white supremacy. We can’t move forward without doing both.

Being Black is being excellent with a love of self and our people throughout the diaspora and knowing we are the true masters of our own fate. This month read my blogs and together let’s dream a world we have created.

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El Hajj Malik El Shabazz, 89 years Strong

 

We need Malcolm X TODAY!

As I sit here thinking about this man, looking at his picture, listening to his words, remembering how he changed me, I cry two types of tears, pain and joy.

My Tears of Pain

I cry because I am angry. I cry because I am hurt. I cry because I feel so helpless because I was only 4 when he died and I wish I could have done something. I cry for the trials he faced as a Black Man in America. He stood up for what he believed and he was shot ten times in his chest, thigh and ankle, plus four bullet creases in his chest and thigh in front of his family.

See this strong Black man had to be killed because he was a threat to white supremacy because he taught us how to think for ourselves. As he said asking for civil rights meant the white man was still on top to beg him for something that you already possess as a human being. When that light went on my life changed. Too many of us today live our lives not knowing anything about our contributions to humanity and continually are led by whatever agenda anybody else has and those of us that try to keep building on Bro. Malcolm’s legacy half the time are called racists or living in the past.

You have to have power to be a racist and the past is ever present from Trayvon being killed to the first Black president being called a Nigger. But just like a dog licks his balls because he can, incidents of our disappearance, discrimination and murder go on because it can. We are too damn busy laughing at memes about Jay Z and Solange. Oh yeah I laughed to but I’m about my work too. We still haven’t gotten the memo that you can laugh and joke but when it’s time you don’t need to PLAY.

You don’t like the comments of Don Sterling but he’s in the Jewish Mafia that controls you. Sterling made his billions off YOU as a slumlord. But then he pays off all the right Colored people that give him awards so they keep their mouths shut because YOU don’t fund them. Any group still Colored in 2014 is bought and paid for and since most of us don’t fund our own organizations or colleges, the United Negroes still begging white folks to keep their schools open. All yall bougies can’t even do that. I went to Marquette and I don’t send them a dime. I don’t have to. Stern, Silver, Sterling and most of the owners and folk that run the NBA, all the Jewish Mafia that won’t let Bill Russel or no other great do shit. Is that being anti-semetic? Nope just the truth. Semites look like me.

No affront to proud Gay Black Men but I find it compelling that the first “Openly” gay basketball or football player are Black. We know dang well gay men have been playing in both leagues probably since they started. But there’s nothing better to show on natonal tv than a blubbering Michael Sam to add to the image of the current Black metrosexual man.

I’m not homophobic because by the definition that would mean I’m afraid of you. I’m not. Gay is not the new Black because you can be gay and still racist. Just like sunday is the most segregated day of the week, there are white gay clubs and black gay clubs just like churchs. The only thing we have in common is we are both hated. But Gay folk have healthcare, education, housing, higher income, tv shows, movies, books, magazines that The Gay Mafia will make sure they have. The Gay Mafia is going to make sure you pay for the F word for life just as Isaiah Washington. They want to compare their discrimination to Black Folk but there really isn’t a comparison because they have more power. You can’t make someone accept you. You can only see to it that they respect your rights. But that’s another blog.

Bro. Malcolm I am sorry that we have not lived up to your example. But then I do have tears of joy.

On your 89th birthday, I am rededicating myself to your teachings. Because of technology more people than ever can learn about you and love you as I do. There are still those of us that carry on for you and from your wisdom can see straight through the tricks that have not changed since you transitioned. Happy Birthday El Hajj Malik El Shabazz. May you continue to be a light that guides us. By Any Means Necessary.

64 Years a Slave on the NBA Plantation

nbanbastatsretrieved from http://www.fivethiryeight.com

In 1950 Earl Lloyd became the first black player in the NBA. We already know what he went through. Now 64 years later not much has changed other than the fact that Black Men dominate the game. The players are still owned and traded. Michael Jordan is the only Black owner and as the stats listed show the abysmal representation or should I say non-representation of Blacks in the league speaks volumes. All of it is bullshit-Sterling, the NBA, the players and African Americans. Here is why:

Sterling is a racist asshole from way back. Everybody knows it but he is a billionaire and he can do what the hell we wants. That’s America. Banished means what? If he owns the building they practice in you mean to tell me he can’t go there? A general manager has been appointed. Like Sterling really took care of the day to day ish. Get real. All bullshit. I didn’t like what he said but hell what black person doesn’t work for or with a racist? That’s just real talk. I’ll say later what I think should be a solution to the disrespect. Oh yeah he bought and paid so many African Americans who didn’t say jack. Figures.

The NBA is full of shit too because they know who Sterling is. Always have and the other owners are scared shitless their dirt will be next. Slippery slope my ass. Michael Jordan had a time getting to be an owner and they love his dirty drawers with his sell out ass. Yes I said it, I was done with him when he put the Million Man March down but that’s another blog. The states say only 18% of the office staff is Black. So where are the Black PR people, Black entertainment lawyers, Black administrative staff etc? If Black players are 75 percent of the revenue makers, 75 percent of the employees should be Black too. That’s fair. The NBA got the $2.5 million fine. I wonder how many Black folk will get any of that money? Who are the groups they are contributing to that deal with racism and intolerance and how many Black folks work for them? All bullshit.

The Slaves, I mean Players. For all those thinking they make too much money, you are an idiot. If they are making millions they are generating trillions. They employ the parking lot attendants, ticket outlets, concession stands, beer, Nike, Wilson, jerseys and gear, the cleaning people, the friggin electricity being used. Does your boss pay you at you are really worth? No well my point exactly. One negro like LeBron James does what he wants and they treat him like a slave running up north! I blame the players for just being paid and not demanding shit else. They could make things better for the college players so they get better benefits and unionize. Hell all the pro players should too. Few of them hire their own people as lawyers, publicists, personal managers, etc. Spending their money on white girls and bullshit shows how irresponsible they are and they wonder why they get no respect. If you act like little boys you will be treated as such. Grow a pair and do something for the black boys that look up to you and who will be you one day. The few that do remember who they are are few in numbers.

My solution? Why doesn’t each NBA have a training center/scholarships for every city where a team exists. The NBA is a nonprofit. They could easily fund such a program. No they want players to stay slaves and asleep.

Everyone is at fault in my book and this was no victory for anybody but Sterling because his only crime will be making more money for speaking his racist mind. African Americans really thought they were vindicated. They so glad Massa paid them some attention and white folks really thought they did a lot too. Real Black people got disrespected and know this shit was just a news cycle diversion off Putin. Real Change makes Real Change. When the dust clears, we got nothing.

Terrorists Even Get White Privilege

terror

 

Dzokhar and Frazier

One appeared on the cover of Rolling Stone. He’s young he’s cute and we already know young white boys get away with murder. Literally. They are troubled and influenced by music, their older radical brother , a movie who knows, anybody and then they just disappear from the media. Dzokhar is still awaiting trial on the one year anniversary of the Boston Marathon Bombing. Young girls are still swooning and what real hard evidence do they have against him anyway?

Frazier is not a tv character but a hard core klansman that’s been on Howard Stern, buying weapons, plotting and planning, snitching on his fellow Aryan brothers and shoots people at a synagogue that aren’t even Jewish. Funny how Black Panthers were killed in their sleep and Klansmen just keep being able to organize and grow.

That’s what I mean about even terrorists get white privilege. People were ready to go string up a dark skinned Arab on the spot that was hurt by the bomb but when it turned out that Dzokhar was an American even though born in Russia the heat cooled off and he made it on the cover of Rolling Stone! Now the FBI is saying Russia didn’t give enough intelligence. Were they supposed to? I thought they were our enemy but I forgot the conservatives love Putin. Better than their own president but in case you forgot he’s , BLACK.

An old redneck Klansmen gets a pass too because he is white. How could they have a file on him probably a foot thick and not see his next move. There goes your theory that big brother is listening and watching or they should have seen this shooting coming. He has been klanning and buying guns for decades. He’ll just be written off as crazy poor white trash. No biggie. Yeah he’ll go to jail, he did kill other white people but they are saying it’s too early to say if they will seek the death penalty. Gotta make sure he’s guilty. Wow.

But God help us if a person is dark, Black, Muslim or Arab doing anything and all hell would break loose. Do you think I could be on Howard Stern, talk about how I hate white folks, stockpile guns and be with fellow Blacks plotting to take “The Man” down without getting shot in my sleep like Fred Hampton? What American born black person or Muslim or Arab has every mass killed any white person? All the American born perps of major shootings or bombings here have been by WHITE Americans! But Willie Horton or a Black welfare queen or a rapper represent the horrifying heinous images that terrify white folks. Wall Street, banks and multi-national corporations are the real Terrorists but I digress.

White Privilege is a mofo.

30 Pieces of Silver and 2 Bitches

silverbJesus was sold out for 30 pieces of silver. But his resurrection is an inspiration for renewal. Judas did what he was supposed to do to fulfill prophesy. But why would two bitches that call themselves his sons, be trying to sell the bible and nobel peace prize of Martin Luther The King as WE call him? Yes his sons are two broke ass need to get a job BITCHES! We need to stop being so politically correct and call a spade a spade no pun intended. There are just some things you don’t do. The man gave his life and the best you can do is sell prized possessions we all should be protecting.

My next question is, if they are that damn broke why can’t somebody black give them a damn job? Why do all of our scholars, activists or leaders always have to be broke as hell. We don’t take care of them so why are we so surprised when they sell out because their basic needs are not met? The great Huey Newton died doing drugs. A great mind destroyed because dealing with life is a bitch but when you try to stand for something for your people too often WE leave you hanging. We rally around them and shout power to the people but we don’t put our money where our mouth is and all the bullshit we buy could easily help others if we just pulled back a little.

Next question, who is going to buy the bible and prize? A Klansmen for all we know. For how much? Can’t any of these people make the purchase like Kanye whose spent millions on who, Kim or Dr. Dre that gave millions to USC that we know still practices white supremacy or how about athletes, rappers, Oprah or Tyler Perry that can buy an island?

Let’s stop reading an article about Bernice and shaking our damn head and somebody start a fund, say maybe the Alphas that built the monument and buy the items ourselves. I am just so sick to death of hearing about sell out bullshit. We’ve got to start taking a hard look at what is important in our culture and protecting what’s ours because that’s why we get no respect. We pray and keep asking God to do what we need to do for ourselves. Use the money you’ve been blessed to earn to build and protect your own. Stop the killing of our men the the bitchification of them because they have no finances. Judas fulfilled his purpose. What the Hell are we doing?

And another thing, the least yall can do for me is follow me and pass the word because I am putting myself out here by telling the truth. LOL DO SOMETHING! Give a Damn.

Dunn is Done

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4 second degree ATTEMPTED murder but a young Black man is DEAD. Not attempted to be dead but dead. It’s unbelievable how worthless our legal system continues to deem young Black men. I’ve already been called a race baiter by a white man and a dumb bitch by a Black Negropean so let me get the record straight.

Why are you always race baiting when you call racist white folks out. You created the system and it works for YOU. We all know if a brother shot at 4 white boys and killed one because their music was too loud be it rock or rap, his black ass would be under a jail by now. Stand your ground would not work for him. The sistah in florida that shot a ceiling when her abusive husband came after her got 20 years in 12 minutes. She’s been released but still has to go back to court. So all of you wanting to get rid of the law is not really going to change much because any law in place never applies to us in the same way. Nobody has to bait anybody because Stevie Wonder can see how jacked up the system is and getting angry about it is a perfectly normal response.

To the Negropean that said I was too emotional and had an incomprehensible response, you are typical. First degree murder is based on intent, deliberation and premeditation. The software engineer is not a stupid man and so he intended to kill, he didn’t deliberate long and did it deliberately and premeditation was the fact that he sat in his car and said f it I’m shooting. Murder in the FIRST Degree but the jurors just couldn’t convict. I hope it was due to the Black Jurors that held out as to why there was a mistrial. They couldn’t give this fool a second degree MURDER charge either?

What’s the outcome? The mother of Jordan Davis is a better woman than I am. I pray he gets it the first week he’s in jail. We’ve been waiting on justice for 500 years. No more marches, no more walking slow and singing low, it’s time to fight back on several fronts. We need to:

1. Get the prosecuters fired and unelect Rick Scott

2. Boycott Florida until Stand your ground is repealed

3. Boycott business supporters of ALEC that supported the law

4. Support all the other victims of the law

5. Bust caps in every white person like Dunn or anybody we feel threatened by

Trust me racists aren’t ready to die as quick as they are ready to kill and the moment Mr. Charlie starts getting his ass shot the law will be changed immediately. RIP Jordan Davis and Trayvon Martin, your deaths will not be in vain. Hopefully the brothers inside will see to that.

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These Three Words

 

I’ve been sitting here thinking about what to write for Black History Month. Should I express my complete and utter feelings of anger at every instance of racism I am seeing on a rise in society? Do I rant on the disrespect for everything Black like the celebrity fight of the killer of Trayvon Martin whose death still brings me to tears every time I think of him? Do I rail on Negropeans like Allen West that want to be White so bad he doesn’t deserve to be in the skin he’s in?

There is so much pain, hatred and emptiness to go around. Black History Week that became Black History Month was started by Bro. Carter D. Woodson to make us remember who we are as a people. It’s human to get mired in the hatred that has and continues to oppress us. Daily news reports of death, unemployment, lack of health care you name it we are at the very bottom or the very top of lists that prove very little has changed in this country. Especially power structure for all you Negropeans that beg to differ because you are a house nigger. Basically that scenario hasn’t change much either. House or Field we make that decision early on and live our lives accordingly, I would have been the one always running or grinding the glass for you know what.

As I get older I find the best way to deal is to love yourself and your people MORE. I don’t mean love as a way to passively go through life and take what’s given to you. I mean it as a way to elevate yourself to a level spiritually that makes you fear-LESS. See racism only works when you live in fear. If you fear the White Man he will always control you and you will never be FREE. A good example to me is this past superbowl. The great white hope Peyton Manning was the man of the hour. He had the best offense in the game. They were supposed to win. But their asses got handed to them. Why? Those young brothers wanted it and did not let the world tell then any different. The young quarterback thanked God after the game. If He knows his creator and is the brains behind the plays, Sherman and the others know who they are and whose they are and they shut it down. They love the game and they loved each other. Period.

The lesson to me is when we love ourselves enough to be fearless in our personal lives and live up to our greatest potential, when we express that love to each other there is no racist that can hold us back. The Jig is up and that’s what white supremacy is afraid of. When you are no longer afraid to be who you are their time is up. These Three Words. Saying and believing it of yourself and your people will give you the strength to fight the fight, build your community, spend your money wisely, pool your resources and create strong families.

I LOVE YOU! Happy Black Ourstory Month and Make it Count!

Remembering American Terrorism, Happy MLK Day

martinMy last post last month was right after the death of Nelson Mandela and all the cute grandpa pictures of him and the accolades from around the world. Today I’m thinking about how we’ve fallen for the same okey doke with Dr. Martin Luther King. We remember his eloquent words, the marches, I have a dream and the powerful pictures of the march on Washington. We get a 3 day weekend and probably will go shopping or lay around all day and never really give a thought to what he did and what happened to him.

He was assassinated. A high powered rifle blew his neck out. Look at the picture above again. That’s the reality and that’s why this post is about remembering American terrorism. Let’s see Medgar Evers and Malcolm, JFK and Robert Kennedy too. America doesn’t like real leaders and takes out anybody that galvanizes too many people. Let’s be real.

So I think about my life on days like this. The main lesson Martin did teach us, even though I didn’t agree with non-violence, was to live and die for what you believe. He said can’t nobody ride your back unless it’s bent. When I think about the courage it took to say no more, I am brought to tears.Those with little means sacrificed it all.

So today, don’t do the King Day Sale at Macy’s (just kidding) or have a twerk party (have you seen the posters?) but ask yourself is fear dictating my life and my decisions? Are you really living not surviving? Is fear of losing a job, fear of losing a relationship or just plain False Evidence Appearing Real controlling you? Terrorist count on your fear. Martin and the civil rights movement stopped being afraid and stood up so their backs were not bent. They showed us we don’t have to be afraid either. That my friends was the greatest gift he gave us so please honor him with your life by truly living it.

Power To The People–Amandla Awethu

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To our ancestor I give much respect and all that could be said has already been said. The respectful condolences and praise. The racists too. Their crap I just heard about because I didn’t want to burst a blood vessel tripping on how ignorant they can be. But his death has made me really sit down and think about some things.

The world loves the smiling grandpa that Mandela’s image above commands. How loved he was for turning from his stand of fighting back with the ANC to 27 years in prison and  changing to peace. White folks love that. Then there is the forgiveness and reconciliation in South Africa. Black folk do all the forgiving and to this day I don’t know what in the hell got reconciled when they still don’t have shit. Who really benefited and what do Black folk in South Africa really have? They took a page from the American playbook of if you can’t beat them, join them. Give them a vote and let them really think they have something but never share the money and power.

Just like here, we have a Black President and a vote and we are still at the bottom of everything. Worst housing, education, health care, unemployment, legal rights you name it.For all the Negropeans with Stockholm syndrome that will start talking about what have Black folks done for themselves I gladly refer you to google Tulsa, Oklahoma 1921 to read about when some brothers that were WW 1 vets that  protected a black man slated to be lynched for bumping into a white woman. It is the only US city bombed from the air. They were standing up and they were killed. We’ve been fighting since we got here but too many of us now are sleeping with the enemy in every sense of the word.

But what has all this love and forgiveness really gotten us? Staying alive maybe? America doesn’t send bibles to Iraq or Afghanistan so why is it we always take the violence and continue biting the pillow? I’m sorry I just don’t have the capacity to keep forgiving. I am unashamedly Black and unapologetically Christian but I’ve never believed that non-violence and forgiveness is the only way to deal with oppression. Jesus kicked some ass with a whip. I just feel we always get the short end of the stick and so many of us fall for Symbol and forget about substance. We are still at the bottom people. Mandela you are the last of your kind. Your passing just made me see more clearly how far we still have to go. The struggle continues. Amandla Awethu/1

Sistahs N SistahHood

Image11/12/13 is my Sorority’s Founders’ Day this year and we are celebrating 91 years of service. I joined over 30 years ago and dedicated myself to “Greater Service, Greater Progress.” Today I want to talk about the power of SistahHood. I use this spelling to denote the union of women of color that created a Sorority in a time when racism was rampant and women had just gotten the right to vote.

But as I think about our her-story and how far we have come as women, I am always motivated to do more. As a Black woman that was a queen in her homeland, was brought to Amerikkka to be raped, beaten, bred with her father, son or brother to produce babies to be sold. My mother and grand mother picked cotton, cleaned houses, raised white children and their own, cooked, made clothes and made a dollar out of 15 cents. My grandmother even washed the mentrual rags of white women with her hands. There were no tampons or washing machines. That degrading task is forever a reminder to me of the focus we must have.

You see so many women that are my foremothers made sacrifices I can barely imagine but their focus was always to survive and prepare for the next generation. The cooked pies and pooled the resources they had to build schools and colleges and pushed for the education of youth. My Founders did. They kept pushing and organizing and served in the military and worked in factories and got Phd’s. They lifted as they climbed.

We have such a rich legacy as women but the world still is filled with racism and sexism so our race and gender is still very much under attack. Media still portrays us as crack heads, prostitutes or judges. Go figure that! First Lady Michelle Obama is more of a discussion about her arms and ass and attitude rather than her intellect, she was Barack’s boss when they met. Twerking and a Black woman’s ass clapping is the image of choice for media as well as discussions about our hair, weaves, lack of marriage and children born out of wedlock.

My Sistahs, the attacks on us have not changed but have we? Are we more worried about if we have a man, how we are dressed, what purse we carry, our nails and hair and whose husband we will go after? Are we pooling our finances and building schools for our children and providing employment for each other? Will any piece of man with a dick and a pillowcase be good enough to get it?

Unfortunately there are women that fit these stereotypes, that are selfish and rude.Unfortunately too many of us waste our money on what we want instead of what we need.  I know there are still women working hard every day. Still raising children, being positive wives, daughters, sisters that are students to corporate executives. We are doing it and I love you Michelle Obama as a role model of class, intellect, beauty and accomplishment. But what has changed my sistahs? Being dedicated to the race and gender is no longer a general priority. There are some of us that continue the work but on the whole on average, we have picked up the bad habits of society and adopted the me, my, mine attitude. There are women that are more worried about looking good at the club and their kids look like hell. There are women that be damned to the family that only want married men. There are gold diggers that will suffer abuse for the mighty dollar. We hate on each other and act as though we are each other’s worst enemy. It’s got to stop!

Sistahs, God ordained us to give birth to not only children but to the future. We raise our men, we chose who is worthy to be a man, we determine the course our people are taking. You have a great responsibility and it is high time that we remember the women before us and make our race and gender a priority in our thinking and actions or we are doomed. My grandmother’s hands in bloody water that was not her own makes me remember the legacy she passed on to me.

Happy Founders’ Day my Sorors and to all my Sistahs Remember Who and Whose You ARE!